Everyone Has Their Own Destiny, but Not Everyone Chooses To Follow it

The circus is calling!

I haven’t written in a while because I keep thinking I’m going to get back on my bike so I should wait till that happens. Well it’s not so the least I can do is update you on my life now that the glitter has worn off from Disneyland. I thought I would ride when I went back to my parents last week, as H-town is pretty safe traffic wise and nothing really technical mountain. But I didn’t want to go out by myself, it’s not that I’m worried about crashing so much I’m worried about crashing by myself again and taking another 6 years off my parents lives as a result. So the only bikes I have been on at this point is my baby bike, which I ride around at work (it compliments the tall bike well) and helps to keep my hips loose (nothing like Mary Clair’s “birthing hips” but pretty good for me). And my cruiser, well actually my roommates cruiser, mostly. I have the same one but mine is pink (although I’m sure Ross from Friends would argue it’s “salmon”) and his is silver and has black pegs so I usually take it so people think I’m a badass even when I wear a skirt (which I’ve actually found why they make women’s bike with slopping toptubes, so do you don’t flash someone when wearing a skirt and getting off your bike, those little life lessons that are rather important). He’s not riding it much so I figure why not, all I need is a fake tattoo arm sleeve to give me real street credit. 

The most BAs you’ve ever seen right?

I know that I’m ready to bike though, like last time when I was sitting in Russian class and heard cmertb (death) and knew it was time to get back on the bike. Only this time it was a UPS guy who set me off. See I finally ordered a helmet specifically for mountain biking, it’s black and I think it will serve me well. When he walked into the store with my box I was immediately overcome with excitement, so much so that I could not contain it and skipped up to meet him. I professed “I get to ride my bike now!” he didn’t exactly share my enthusiasm. I figured that was a good sign. I also switched out my stem because it was bent, which threw the handlebars off. It made me feel better that there was some damage to the bike (I’m glad it wasn’t a lot) like maybe I didn’t sacrifice my body to save my bike but we were in the crash together. (Is it problematic how much I humanize my bikes?) Now I just have to ride. Stay tuned…

Let me fill you in on what has happened, and then hasn’t. 
I bought a new computer…and then returned it.
I started class at DU…and then dropped it. 
See I bought the new computer because with going back to school Apple had a student promo. Nothing was terribly wrong with my computer, it’s a little old and it’s nickname in college was Terry, because if it’s not plugged into a power outsource it dies…I know sooo inappropriate (but a little funny?). But nothing really wrong. And I returned it after I dropped my class, because I felt bad getting a discount and not being a student anymore….I really can’t afford to do anything that compromises my karma these days. 
The class at DU was Global Health Affairs, which I’m really interested in but it didn’t sit too well that it was in the International School and I would be required to get a masters in that field while only getting the certificate in GH. After having a lack-luster major in college I want to be excited about my Masters. I actually found a program at CU in the Public Health School that I’m really excited about and applied into that to start in the spring. 

I was also a little anxious about starting class as I still have some memory lapses and have some issues speaking that I’m hoping are the result of the concussion and not the fact that I’m getting old (I’m 2 years away from being a quarter done with my life). It takes me a little longer to formulate sentences that are fluid and I put abnormally awkward pauses in that would make Mrs. Rowley cringe. The only other repercussion that has seemed to linger, well not so much linger but more enhance a problem that was already there is my complete lack of direction. I still have no idea what streets run parallel and which are perpendicular to my house. I’ve had to dismiss phone calls to get on google maps and then only to find out I’m 2 blocks from my house. I’m not sure that will get better, but I wouldn’t be upset if it did. 

I’ve also been running and swimming more. I really like swimming, well more like I like it after I’m done swimming but I would recommend it to everyone. Running is good I usually stick to 30-45 minutes but I’m not really time obsessive about anything these days so I just run until I don’t want to anymore. Hopefully I don’t end up like Forrest Gump. I was thinking the other night when I was running how when I couldn’t run, biking was there for me and when biking is on pause, running is there. Maybe one day they’ll both be on and I’ll do a triathlon- HA! Because we all know how well I train for running events…

You will not regret this decision.

I’ve also been reading more (I don’t know if anything can beat a book in a park). Recently I’ve read “How to be a Woman” by Caitlin Moran (pronounced Cat-lin, she misread a name when she was a kid and has kept it up for 27 years, as her real name is Catherine) and while I don’t think I’m much closer to landing a date after finishing it, one thing she said stuck with me. She lives her life like there is no Heaven. Not that she doesn’t believe in a higher being but rather she argues we get complacent because we believe there will be another chance waiting in Heaven. To make amends with someone, to tell them how you really feel, to have a second chance. We take life more like a waiting room for the bountiful feast that awaits on the other side. What if it’s not waiting wouldn’t that change how you lived? If we don’t do it right this time, well have a chance to fix it on the other side. I was reminded of this when I was flipping through my photos when I was backing up Terry, and I saw all the pictures from my training rides, I rode in some beautiful scenery, but I’m not sure I ever really saw it. And then I realized I get to do it all again, better this time and I didn’t have to die to get my second chance. I’m a pretty lucky girl.

And I can’t wait.

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