Definitely not as suave

This view never gets old

If attacked, fight back works for a lot of things in life

If I had a dollar for every time someone has told me that I’m one lucky SOB I’d at least have 4 and that’s just from one day. I decided to go for a ride last Thursday because it was suppose to be the last warm day for a while (rumor was a month but I think it’s only a few days) and really wanted to ride. I haven’t ridden since I did Hall a few weeks ago and started to get cabin fever so decided I would ride in the morning before work. I decided to do Chimney Gulch, the one I had done with Wayne at the beginning of December but skip the section with the waterbars (because I was going to be riding alone didn’t want to crash over one and get knocked out). There is a place you can park that skips that section so I did that. I texted my roommate to tell him where I was riding and told him I should be off the trail by 11 (I always add in an hour extra than what I plan on riding just for shenanigans). I wasn’t planning on being out that long so stuffed everything into my jersey pockets. Which means I left my knife in the car (If I learned one thing from 127 Hours it’s to always have a sharp knife on you) but figured I’d be okay because it runs parallel with a paved road that has bikers on it all the time. I started the ride and the trail was in good condition some snowy patches in shaded coverage but that was about it. You climb for a little bit at the beginning and then the trail flattens out before it dips down into tree coverage and then you climb out and then you’re pretty much at the top. I was turning the bend where it starts to flatten out when I saw something out of the corner of my eye bounding up the hill out of the grass about 20 feet in front of me. “Huh, that’s a really big coyote….oh shit, that’s a mountain lion.” I stopped and it stopped on the trail and had its back turned to me. I froze for a second almost out of curiosity, I’ve never seen one and was captivated by it and then I remembered it kills people. I didn’t want to turn around when it had its back to me because like my high school track coach said you should always see what’s going to kill you (he used this when it came to running against traffic). I grabbed my phone (because I still had 2 hours until anyone was expecting to hear from me) and my tool was in the same pocket. Not that my tool would really do anything to it. And then it turned and looked at me. Not going to lie I might of peed a little. It seemed like a few minutes but I’m sure it was mere seconds that we held the death stare when I threw my tool down on a nearby rock to hopefully startle him. It did and he turned and scampered down the hill. I picked my tool up and stuffed it back into my jersey with my phone and then kept riding. This is how I know my frontal lobe is still damaged. Those critical thinking skills just aren’t there yet. It was about 1/2 mile before I heard my Godfather’s voice go “How’s this report going to look?” 

I should probably just stick to writing….

Which he always asks if I’m debating doing something stupid. I started to get into the tree coverage area when I realized just how stupid I was being. I was lucky that I saw him the first time but I probably wouldn’t see him the second time. I turned around and booked it back to my car. I texted my roommate a mere 30 minutes after my initial text “….yah, I’m off the trail there was a mountain lion so I’m going to go run in the park where people are.” I didn’t call home for a few days after that because I knew I didn’t want to tell my parents and freak them out so sorry mom and dad you had to find out this way. I did tell my Godfather just because of his voice popping into my head I figured he would be pleased to hear that. He asked me if I got a picture. I told him that I wasn’t exactly thinking about my blog at that point. He said too bad I should just draw one.  The picture isn’t that accurate, I cut my hair so my braids aren’t that long and I was wearing knickers not short shorts. But the mountain lion was definitely bigger than me. Just kidding. 

You’d be scared to not do your exercises with this guy

When I was driving home one of the thoughts I had was, well at least I’ll have something to tell my physical therapist. Last time he asked me to tell him stories of my adventures the most exciting thing I had was I finished my book. The therapist is really cool though, if The Dude from The Big Levowski was a hand therapist this would be him, he even looks like Jeff Bridges. The first time I was in he was evaluating my strength and flexibility on both hands and after my right hand grip test he asked me what else I do besides biking. I tried to think of all the activities I do related to hand use and rattled off a few, “running, reading, knitting, writing, and swimming, not so much with the swimming and knitting these days because those bother my hand a little much.” 
“Hmm well your grip strength is off the charts.” I thought he was being sarcastic so I laughed and told him some of the guys at the shop call me farm strong. He wasn’t kidding though. For a girl my age the normal range is 37-59 pounds. I’m at 87 for my right hand my left hand (which was broken for 5 months) is in the normal range at 39. He’s also pretty funny which is good because I’m stuck with him for 45 minutes two times a week. He was asking me what I want to do with my life and I responded with my generic “oh you know maybe this maybe that.” He suggested I go to school to be a hand therapist so I can give hand jobs the rest of my life. I told him I might just so I can make jokes like that! The exercises are definitely helping though, I get to play with silly putty two times a day as part of it it. I still notice some limitations with flexibility and strength but I’m sure it’ll get there. I did play volleyball one night and bruised my left hand on the outside. I was trying to get a ball out the net and when I fell and I must have stuck out my hand but didn’t want to catch myself with it so smacked it right where the ulna and triquertrum meet. It left a bruise which my therapist wasn’t too happy about. I told him it’s kind of funny though because I’ve been played volleyball pretty consistently for a good 7 years and never injured my hands in any capacity, not even jammed figures from blocking. He didn’t think it was that funny and just said he was putting it in my file to cover his ass. 

I’m pretty good at that!

I’ve noticed more improvements with my head, at least when it comes to long term memory. One of my friends was talking about her favorite movie, The Sound of Music and how the younger ones have a ski resort in Vermont and I said, “Greta?” which I have no idea how I remembered that but was really excited when I did. I also go my hair cut recently and had seen her before Halloween when she was telling me about her costume and I remembered that she was going as a Toddlers in Tiaras with her friends. There are still definitely lapses. The new running shoes I ordered I wasn’t super stoked on, well I was because they’re awesome trail running shoes but I thought I ordered them in blue but was super excited and surprised when I received purple and green. I doubled checked to make sure they didn’t mess up my order and I ordered them in purple and green. I also went to Zero Dark Thirty the other night (which is a great movie) and was really amazed at how fast the production happened given we had just killed Bin Laden in May, and then I realized I was missing another year. Whomp whomp. 

“This photo validates how cool I am” said everyone on instagram.

Running has been going well, I’m thinking about signing up for a 5K just to see where I’m at. Because my therapy appointments are in Boulder I usually run after those but before going to work (thank goodness we have a shower at work!). The only problem is that it tends to be a little windier there than in Denver, which is great when it’s a tail wind it just sucks when you turn around and it’s like running into a brick wall. It reminds me of the sled pulls we used to have to do in college for volleyball the only big difference is that I don’t throw up after. 

At the top of Hall

I finally got my stitches taken out. It definitely helped that the whole way (60 miles) to the doctor’s office my mom kept asking me, “What are you going to ask the doctor.” So when the nurse called my name in the waiting room I immediately said, “Can you take my stitches out?!??” Which they were clueless as to why I even had stitches since it was a different doctor but at least they’re out. I also got my cast off which has led to me getting more compliments on my hair because now I can spend time blow-drying my hair and not my cast. I start physical therapy tomorrow (which at this point I should have just stayed living in Boulder) and I’m not sure what they’ll make me do, my strength is still lacking and my flexibility is still the same that it was before the cast so hopefully they can fix that. I did Hall Ranch a few days after I got my cast off, I wasn’t really planning on doing it so there was no one to go with me but I did tell someone where I was going. I really like riding by myself because I can work on skills that I want to and ride sections multiple times but it’s not great when you crash and random people find you (you can’t have your cake and eat it too, I suppose). It was really fun and a really good thing that when I rode it with Wayne and his friend they didn’t think the rock garden would be good to go down with my cast, and they were right there is no way I would have made it out of there without going over the handlebars. I definitely needed to be able to hold onto the handlebars and use the brake. It also got me on a kick about getting a full suspension bike with it geared more towards downhilling. That definitely might be medicated, or post concussion me talking. Ever since the crash I’ve had a really intense need to go downhilling, I keep telling people I want the snow to melt so Winterpark can open back up for bikes (I’m finding people in Colorado really like snow and being able to go skiing so I have to be careful who I tell this to). The guys at the shop almost had me talked into a bike too, but I googled “impulse decisions and concussions” and realized it might still be just a symptom and I should probably hold off on that decision at least for a few weeks. Stay tuned.

I need a new habit….

I did crash and got the worse bruise I’ve had all season. Not on the Hall Ranch ride though, oh no, that would have made too much sense. A few days later Wayne and I were riding from his house to his friends for a Christmas party. I was on his commuter and I made him carry the bin full of cookies “just incase“. It had snowed that day and the sidewalks were still pretty icy. I was being super cautious because someone told me my clumsiness is a habit that is formed out of my carelessness when I’m not paying attention. I was being really meticulous about my movements and really paying attention to what the bike was doing. I was doing a great job navigating the streets too and was really proud of myself when I saw that I had made it to the driveway of the house. (Clearly I should not count my chickens before they hatch.) I put one foot down so I wouldn’t ramp up the curb and completely lost my footing and the bike went out one way and I went the other leaving me completely sprawled out in the driveway. Fortunately Wayne was far enough ahead he didn’t even notice and no one inside looked out the window to see me spread eagle in the driveway. It wasn’t until later that I noticed the blood soaking through my jeans that I realized I smacked the ground pretty good. The bruise followed the next day and is still there. Good thing I’m a pro at getting blood out of clothes.

I know you’re jealous.

Christmas was good, I spent about 6 days at home which was really nice but also a bit of a mad rush to see everyone. I was a little nervous for Christmas morning because after the car hit me I ended up with 5 safety vests (apparently no one talked to each other that year…). I got a new jersey from the shop I worked at in college because the one I had from them I was planning on wearing for Leadville but I also wore it the day that I crashed and now it has a gaping hole in it. Now I don’t have to spend months trying to figure out what to wear! My Godfather did give me a water-bottle too. He really put a lot of thought into it too because he found it on the side of the road during the US Pro Cycling Challenge from someone on the Astana team. I’m definitely his favorite because he got that for me in August. He also got me a book about marathon training and a subscription to Runner’s World. He spends a lot of time trying to convert me to the dark side, but it’s slowly getting to me.

They’ll definitely find me!!

 My grandmother, bless her heart, did give me a sparkly red hat to wear when I ride so that “when you crash they’ll be able to find you easier.”

Who wants to join?

 I’ve really gotten on a kick with running lately though, which I’m not sure if it’s post concussion, medicated, normal me or my Godfather finally getting through. I don’t think it’s normal because I’ve never really enjoyed running I just do it to supplement the activities I actually enjoy. Last year, in the same time span I ran a total of 30 miles, 26.2 of those were the marathon and the other 3.8 was the training run before hand. I went to Apsen with some friends over New Year’s and packed my thermal running tights just incase I felt compelled to run in 5 degrees. I did, every day we were there. It was gorgeous and so much fun, there was a trail that went right out of our condo and then into the forest and crossed some ski runs and then back into the forest with amazing views and a really peaceful aura. Last year I wore those same tights once  and that was at our outside sale in March, I thought it would be cold so I wore them under my jeans. I got so excited about running that when I got home I ordered some trail running shoes. However, one of the problems I’m finding  I have with running (besides not being able to go super fast) is how quickly I lose toenails. When I took my toe nail polish off today I realized I have 2 black toenails and there is no way that they are not going to fall off. Which would take me down to 7 toenails…. The only good thing is that I get a discount on pedicures if I have 7 toenails.

I’m planning on setting my bike up on my trainer on Sunday or Monday and start building my base back up (which might stabilize my runner’s high). I’m trying to figure out what TV series I want to get into for it. A couple people have  suggested Breaking Bad, Dexter, or Girls. I went to Best Buy to look at what they had but was not impressed; the only series that they had the first season for was American Horror Story which is just what I want to watch before I go to sleep. If you have any suggestions I’ll at least probably take whatever into consideration (I don’t have cable and have no idea what is on TV). You don’t need to suggest Desperate Housewives, I watched all the seasons when I was recovering from surgery a few years ago.

Story of my life….

The lottery for Leadville is open, I asked Wayne if he wanted me to sign him up again but he said no and I haven’t talked any of the guys in the shop to put in for it. I haven’t signed up for it or emailed that lady about it either. I’ll probably put it on my list of things to do in the next few days and maybe see if I can talk a few kids into signing up too. I’m also super pumped that there is no leap day this year because my parents made me the same offer they did last year. If I don’t meet the insurance deductible they’ll pay it to me. Leap Day definitely through it all off though, I have a really good feeling about this year.

Didn’t want to risk it…

Nonononononono. Stop. Your cast is almost off and if you break your arm again it will be another 5 weeks before you can really wash your hair. Stop. This is what I said to myself before I almost went down a technical section on a ride with Wayne. It’s all rock and you descend and turn about midway through. I’ve done the section before, but not with a cast on, and I’ve seen someone tumble and break their arm going down. I stopped and walked down. Lair O’ The Bear, the trail we were on might be my favorite on the front range. It’s slightly technical but not overly so that you become frustrated and after a nice little climb up, the trail turns into rollie-pollie-goodness. It’s smooth and there is good flow  and it always hits the spot. If you could turn your morning coffee into a trail, it would be this one. It also helped that it was December 3rd, 65 degrees  and I was in shorts and a jersey so I think I was relishing in the fact that it was so delicious out.

This past weekend Wayne and I rode Chimney Gulch, which is a pretty good climb filled with an almost annoying amount of waterbars. As we were coming down I ran into a girl I went to college with, so we had to stop because I rarely see anyone I know from CO on the trail, let along anyone from Holy Cross. We chatted for a bit about biking and other HC related gossip and then continued on our way. Wayne got ahead of me in the last mile or so and there was a split in the trail and I could not remember for the life of me which way we came up. Right looked pretty good so I headed down about half a mile only to have it dead end into some sort of sewage drainage structure which I think I would have remember scaling on the way in so I decided to turn around and take the other path. On my way down the right path there was one waterbar which you go over as you turn right (my weak side). I started going but lost control half way through and dismounted,  I was straddling my bike but by then the rear wheel  had rolled onto the waterbar while the front had rolled onto a rock leaving me on my very tippy-tippy toes (good thing for ballet and going en pointe) trying to not become high centered. Because my hips are so tight and I was on my tip toes I couldn’t swing one leg over while holding onto the bike with one hand. I started wabbling forward and my bike began to roll and I started to fall to my left side (the side I always fall on) and saw my casted hand reach out to catch myself and immediately thought of my hair and somehow spun around and fell so that I slid down the trail on my bottom with my bike on top of me.

It might have been the most uncoordinated 15 seconds of my life, and that’s really saying something. At this point I was glad I was separated from Wayne and all other human beings. I did only manage to scrap a finger on my left hand so that was a win, but I did come away with a nasty bruise on the inside of my leg.

This off season I want to work on figuring out my nutrition. Mainly because everything I eat can be broken down into 4.5 things. Rice cakes, peanut butter, grapes, red hot blues, and the occasional trail mix. It’s not the worst diet (mainly because Molly and Abe feed me at least once a week), but I feel like there is definitely room for improvement. Plus my doctor (and my mom) told me I need to eat more protein and incorporate more iron into my diet. I’m trying to eat a cup of spinach and 1 banana a day. Which the spinach is mainly for the iron, and because it usually makes me integrate some other type of food with it. I eat bananas when I ride and they have a lot of health benefits while being really cheap and you always know what you’re getting with a banana, it’s always just kind of “uh, that was okay”, never “Oh my gosh, that was the best banana of my life”. Plus with bananas I figure I can work on my commitment issues, before I would only buy 1 or 2 at a time because I could never commit to eating all the bananas before they go bad. Now I buy a whole hand at a time. This must be what being a grown up is all about.

It’s been interesting having my cast on because the crash is so long ago but because I’m wearing it people seem to feel like it’s okay to ask what happened, which I’ve never really understood because what if it’s actually a horrible story. I did start to get creative at the end because I got bored telling everyone, “I fell off my bike…3 months ago.” Karma is probably going to come back at me for fudging the truth a little bit. I was on a po-go stick and fell into a man hole and got my arm stuck on the way down. Super gross, good thing I passed out from the pain, huh?; I got attacked by a wolf, he bit down on my hand and shook it so hard it snapped my wrist, luckily some hunters were there to get me out of that situation, and because I passed out from the pain I don’t remember much;  Downhill unicycling, yah it’s a pretty badass sport;  Once you start talking compound fractures and bones sticking out people lose interest really fast. I also had 3 different people, while I was working at the shop, ask my if I broke my wrist skateboarding. I’m not sure how they get skateboarder out of a girl who works at a bike shop, paints her nails, and wears boat shoes but I didn’t want to squash their fantasy so I just went with it. And they say I have a TBI?

Those were some fun dreams….

The medicine seems to be steadily working. I have these little epiphany moments when someone will ask me something from a few months or year ago and if I remember I get super excited, so much so that I usually say, “look at my brain working!” I still have my moments, I won’t remember custumers that came in the day before. My sleeping is becoming a little more normal I usually only wake up once or twice at night and then early in the morning. The TBI medicine and the melatonin are both known for producing really vivid dreams. Which I finally had to put a note up because I kept forgetting to not watch Law and Order before bed.

There is  a thread on twitter called #concussionproblems, which I thought would be funny but it’s severely depressing to read. All they talk about is there headaches and how they can’t do anything because they have concussions. Not that I’ve enjoyed my TBI but some of it’s mildly entertaining to just see how my mind wanders and functions in this state because it’s nothing I’ve experience before. If I had a twitter my feed would read like this:

No, ghosts don’t live in your house, you forgot to shut the cupboards when you left. #goodthingthefridgeclosesonitsown #concussionproblems

Lost my keys in Downtown Denver, completely sober.
#concussionproblems

Everyday for the past 11 weeks I’ve forgotten to get my stitches removed, if you see me please remind me.
#concussionproblems

Set car alarm off again to figure out where I was parked.
#concussionproblems

How do I turn the stove on?
#concussionproblems

Can’t remember if I took my concussion medication or not, have to count all the pills out.
#concussionproblems

Keep forgetting that I don’t really like running so I keep running.
#concussionproblems

Went to a pumpkin carving party….forgot the pumpkin
#concussionproblems

Forgot they took my cast off…only washed my fingers.
#concussionproblems

Meant to send Kara a check 4 weeks ago for a t-shirt, keep forgetting to text her to tell her I haven’t.
#concussionproblems

Started looking up health benefits of bananas…ended up learning that 1/6th of the time spent filming Alfred Hitchcocks’s Movie Psycho was spent shooting the shower scene.
#howigotthereidon’tknow #concussionproblems

Disclaimer: I did wash my hair while my arm was in a cast but because of it’s thick unruly nature it was really hard to “get in there real nice and deep” (name that movie) with only one hand. While I’m thankful for dry shampoo, I’m more thankful for the ability to wash my hair with two hands. It’s the little things you miss

Also I don’t mean to make fun of the people on twitter or take there concussions lightly but I approach my injuries with humor, mainly because I know I won’t be in this state forever, while I have had moments of frustration (losing my keys in dd was not fun) I know that my big healthy brain (you know that one that attracts all the boys to the yard) will be back. One day at a time.

We take our running very seriously….

“We could dress up as a banana and a gorilla!!” They were definitely at the first Thanksgiving. “Yah! I’ll try to find a banana costume and if not we’ll do pilgrims or something boring.” And that’s how Molly and I decided to dress up for the Turkey Trot. Somehow my roommate was able to materialize a banana costume for me and Molly already had a gorilla costume (their costume box runs pretty deep). We both lasted about 50 yards into the run before I lost my top (to the wind, found it though) and Molly took off her mask so she could breath. A 5k is one of those distances that attracts all levels of fitness, from those high school cross country kids to the couch potatoes who are just walking it. Any time we passed a kid and their parent the parent would say to the kid, “You’re not going to let a gorilla and a banana pass you, are you?” Clearly because we’re dressed in costumes we don’t exude any level of fitness. It was a good run, neither of us wore watches and weren’t really concerned with our time. Which was good because I’m trying to soften my competitive spirit just until I get my mojo back so I don’t go off getting hurt again. 

Cannibalism?

I’m not sure if I’m a fan of the medication they put me on for my traumatic brain injury (TBI). I like it but I don’t. I think it’s been helping. I actually walk out of stores and don’t have to walk around pressing the panic button to find my car. But I still have to set an alarm to remind myself to take it. I started it a few weeks ago and the first two days I didn’t get out of bed until late in the afternoon. I did but only to take the medicine and then go back to bed. I started it explicitily on a weekend because one of the side effects was drowsiness and I seem to be sensitive to that sometimes. I was worried about going into work  the next day but luckily it switched to one of the other side effects, insomnia. Which at least gives me more time for activities. If I fall asleep early I wake up really early (Like 4:30 and I’m ready to start the day) or I’ll just wake up through the night. That went on for about 3 weeks until my doctor suggested trying melatonin and sleepytime tea. Which worked well until I woke up at 2:30am having to pee.

Between the TBI state, the medicated state, and what I think my normal state will be eventually I’m not sure which part is controlling what. I was going to go for a night ride for the first ride with my cast, which I didn’t think it would be that bad (even though I’m pretty sure the guys at the shop did an over/under on how bad I was going to crash). It’s probably a good thing one of the guys I was going with decided it was too cold for the short amount of time we’d be out. I was super gung-ho about it, but I think that was the medication, because post-concussion I haven’t had a great time night riding, and normal me doesn’t really like to be cold when I ride. I did go for a ride by myself with my cast and realized I could either hold the handlebar or use the break. The ride was uneventful pretty short, I did a  non technical trail and I didn’t go over the handlebars like one of the guys at the shop thought I would, so that’s a win. 

Pretty sure I walked this part

I did do another ride this past weekend with Wayne and one of his friends. We ended up going to Hall Ranch outside of Boulder, which can be challenging when you don’t have a cast on but I warned them I would be slow and they didn’t seem to care. It starts with a nice technical climb up, which it made me feel better when Wayne walked some of the sections too. I did crash on the way up, I was going pretty slow and thought about trying to catch myself but because I was falling to my left I didn’t want to put out my broken wrist to try and stop myself so I just kind of rolled into it, but apparently not enough because I bruised up my knee, forearm and scratched my cast. The ride down though was pretty delicious. I opted to not use my front break and instead hang onto the handlebar which made me alter my riding style. I think for the better though, it felt more mellifluous, I was more conscious of what my body was doing and wasn’t reacting to what I thought it was going to do. Now all I want to do is ride my bike and get back to that euphoric place. I saw my doctor the next day to get a new cast (It was looking pretty rough before I fell on it). She asked how riding with it was going. I told her, “Well I can either hold the handlebar or use the break, but not both.” She said, “Oh, well that’s probably okay just going on the bike path and stuff.” 
“…Yah, I did Hall Ranch yesterday.” 

After the ride

“You did Hall Ranch, with your cast? All those rocks? Are you trying to get badass points? You really shouldn’t tell me those things.” I almost replied to tell her it was a sound decision to cast it as I fell on my wrist, but it’s like when you do something and after you’re like, welp I’m alive and not hurt so my mom probably doesn’t need to know, so just left it at that. Plus I was trying to get badass points.

I’ve started trying to figure out what rides/events I want to do next summer. I think it was spurred by a recent date (I think it was a date but jury’s still out) that made me realize I need another reason not to date for a year. See the date I went on before this one I offered to split the check and the guy took me up on it. When the guys at the shop caught wind of that they were appalled and told me “Done, next, you’re not seeing him again.” With this guy he seemed pretty cool and I wanted to be able to see him again so when the check came I got really nervous and just awkwardly sat there and didn’t say anything.

It might happen

He ended up paying and probably thinking I’m a huge brat. It basically fizzled out after that, which is probably good but somewhat unfortunate because he is a good biker. I told Molly I need to just stop eating with boys, she suggested I stop making out with them first. Good point. So that’s how I started thinking about what to do next. I was on this kick for about 2 days to do the Leadman Series which is a marathon, 10K, 50 mile bike, 100 mile bike, and 100 mile run in about the span of 7 weeks. I was super enthusiastic too. I was asking people about training and what it would take to get to that running level. Even though I still really want to do it, I’m pretty sure it’s the medicine talking. Let’s be real, normal me has never actually trained for a running event, including the marathon. Soo 100 mile run, yah that’s a really good idea, thanks a lot you sneaky little red pills. I still have till March 2nd to sign up for it and even though I want to I know it’s not a good idea.

Yah….about that….

Like when you’re drunk and a package shows up 4 days later because you went home and shopped online and you’re like, “oh yah, I did do that, that wasn’t the best idea” that is what it would be like when I get off the medicine but I still would have to run 100 miles. Luckily I got a less destructive kick a little later. I was looking at the Breckenridge 100, another 100 mile bike race a few weeks before Leadville. It’s more technical and said to be harder than Leadville. Fortunately that can be done in a team of 3. I quickly contacted a few people who are into cross country racing and solidified a team. Now there is no way I can sign up for the Leadman series. The Leadman series would be fun in a very bizarre way. The Breckenridge 100 will just be fun in an awesome way. 

 

All bundled up!

I’ve also done two night rides. The first one was outside of Boulder so Wayne came with a couple of my coworkers and I. Wayne crushed it per usual, the only time I can beat him on a bike is when he is really really hung over and I’m not. I felt a little better about riding in the dark there because I at least knew the trail (don’t worry mom, we had lights too). Night riding is something you should do at least once. You really have to feel the bike and you’re in the moment because you can’t really see that far ahead to start planning what you’ll have to be doing. There was one section where 2 of the guys were hot on my tail going down hill and my rear wheel started to lose traction and I freaked and pulled off to the side and let them pass me. I started tearing up (which is also how I know I’m still concussed as I’m still more emotional) because it really freaks me out to wake up in the hospital again. One of the older guys rolled up behind me and asked if I was okay, “Yah, just fixing my light.” He said, “Me too.” And waited till I was ready to go on.

This is about all you see on a night ride

The other night ride we did was at Green Mountain which I’ve done a night ride on before, but it was last year so I don’t remember much about it. The nice thing about riding with other people is they usually have similar experiences. And all of them have had to get back on the bike after some crash. Half of the group took off and hammered away for the most part but the other half just took our time. One of the guys I was with had gotten a concussion at the beginning of September, he remembers the crash but it was his first mountain ride since. He’s made similar comments about how you don’t realize how fast your life can change in just a second. I rented one of our full suspension mountain bikes because I thought it might help to get some distance between my bike and I (like a trial separation) and my roommate wanted to try it and see if he should get a hardtail (he liked it and he probably will, if he ever buys a bike). I’m still not sold on them still or the seat that came on it. See I drove down from South Dakota that morning and didn’t have time to go home and didn’t want my roommate looking for my favorite pair of riding shorts (It might be more intimate than rifling through my knicker drawer, jury’s still out). I didn’t think it would be that bad because sometimes I commute without any padding (but I also have a stellar seat). Oh my goodness it was awful! I stood up out of the saddle for most of the climbing (which I realized it might make a good training tool). Afterwards we went to this hole-in-the-wall bar, which had wings as big as your fist. Most of our night rides revolve around getting dollar tacos in Boulder and wings by Green Mountain. It’s not a bad way to plan rides.

I’m pleased to announce that I did not crash on any of those rides but don’t worry I still have a cast on my arm.

When I went back to the doctor about my head I got good news that the amnesia I’ve been having, what with not being able to remember much of the past year is better than not being able to create and store new memories. She also put me on medication that has helped with traumatic brain injuries and is hoping that it will at least help a little bit (it would be nice to walk out of store and remember where I parked my car without having to set off the alarm). I have a 3 months supply of that which ironically is the time I can hit my head again, if there was going to be a time 6 months after is okay, a year is best. I also told her how I’m nervous to crash again, she used to race mountain bikes which is really handy and assured me that it would happen again, but it doesn’t mean I’m going to hit my head again. She pointed out my crash to head hitting ratio and it’s really pretty low. This was the first crash that I’ve really hit my head on. I did get beat up so much on a ride before college graduation I’m pretty sure my mom thought I had an abusive boyfriend, but I didn’t hit my head at all on that ride. She then asked how my wrist was feeling and I told her I didn’t have full range of motion or flexibility and it hasn’t really improved and there is still some pain. She suggested taking X-Rays just to be safe (good thing I already met the deductible this year!) and found a fracture. It had been about 12 weeks (usually a bone heals in 6) but because I kept using it, it was healing much slower than usual. She gave me a brace to wear and sent me on my way. I wore it for the weekend which was good because I tripped when doing a night run and skinned my knee and landed right on it. I do enjoy the looks that often happen when blood is streaming down my leg… I went up to my parents early the next week to watch Mary’s last volleyball game, but her team didn’t make the playoffs so went and saw Heidi and mainly hung out with my Grandma and ate fortune cookies (Loon needs to come up with better fortunes). My doctor emailed me when I was up there saying that the radiologist had found an avulsion fracture and wanted me to come back in when I got back to town. I went back in and she used an ultra sound machine to get a better look. She thinks my ulna bone slammed into some of my wrist bones on impact creating the fractures. Good thing I don’t remember because that definitely would have grossed me out enough to throw up. She decided since there were two fractures it would be better to cast it and really let it heal. Luckily it’s water proof so I can still do swim workouts (that has yet to happen but I’ll let you know if it survives!) She even molded it around handlebars so I can still ride, I am a little apprehensive about that as a kid in high school once blocked wrong and broke both his wrist at the same time..it doesn’t really look like fun. I don’t have too much trouble doing anything though except brushing my hair (I might just have dreads by the end) and getting out of my car and trying to put my jacket and not locking the keys inside….

I told them readers would love this shot! Ha

I spend 2 days last week in Fruita for Trek Demo Days. It was pretty sweet, definitely a destination to go to ride. The day before we got there one of our trek reps was riding and fell and cracked the ball of his hip bone so I wasn’t really sure what I’d be getting into. At the trailhead I turned to my roommate and said “I’m a little nervous, I don’t want to crash.” He replied, “you don’t have to crash.” Logic wins again. It was amusing because I did more riding in those 2 days than I have the past 3 months. It was a good nurturing environment to get back out there. I tried the Lush 29 which has larger sizing than the standard Lush and larger wheels. I definitely fit better on it than the Lush but still felt a little upright and didn’t feel that it was aggressive enough but maybe that’s because I wasn’t being aggressive enough. I’m definitely still passive on descents but I don’t think my mother is complaining. I also went on a road ride with the two Trek Demo Drivers, Josh and Erin and my roommate. I tried the new road bike the Domane which was a little bit more comfortable than the Madone line but still stiff and responsive. We only went about 90 minutes but I poked Erin’s brain for a good portion on all things bikes and her job (she drives around the country teaching women to ride mountain bikes). I also got a flat which I’m glad it was only a flat because as it was happening I thought my front wheel had come lose and I was about to become roadkill. I tried 2 other mountain bikes, the Rumblefish Elite and the Superfly 100. I wasn’t a fan of the Rumblefish, it seemed a little sluggish and I couldn’t do a wheelie on it (which is a very important element in being able to show off to boys). The Superfly 100 is like the older brother to my bike and I didn’t want to ride it because I didn’t want to like it but boy oh boy did I. It was super light and super responsive and super fun. The only problem is that it’s full suspension and I’m too young to be on one. I didn’t crash the whole time I was there but I was climbing through a fence with barbed wire on it and my hips were sooo tight from riding my leg got stuck when I was halfway through and I jabbed it into one of the barbs, luckily someone was there to pick it off, otherwise I might have been stuck for a while. I got a nice cut and some bruising to go with it. If it’s not one thing, it’s another.

I got the best coffee of my life in St. Louis

I decided when I was in Fruita to go back and see my doctor. I just want to get checked out and make sure I’m still on the path to recovery. See the other day I was driving to work and missed my exit, because I couldn’t remember where I needed to get off. I only drive that route almost everyday. I went to St. Louis for the weekend before Fruita and it was only when my mom called to let me know to check my debit card because there had been purchases made in Kansas and Missouri did I realize I forgot to tell her. I went to Redbox to rent a movie and forgot the movie. Now I know that these can all be chalked up to old age. The one that gets me though is I have a hard time remembering the past year. It’s like I woke up thinking it was July 15, 2011 and have continued on from that date. I can’t seem to get to 2012. It’s like everything from July 15, 2011 to July 31, 2012 has been cut out and the time has been squished together. I do remember certain events especially when I read about them or someone mentions something but I can’t place them on the time table without it feeling like it’s in a dream. Wayne thinks I should just get more concussions that way I keep getting younger. I‘m not expecting anything bad on the report just want to make sure it’s relatively normal, maybe it’s not a bad thing I forgot the past year. Ha 

Molly and Abe had a Halloween party on Friday night and they dressed up as the Red Queen and the Mad Hatter, so it was only fitting when they found a costume at the thrift store for 7 dollars for me to go as Alice. Molly and Abe go all out, it’s actually really impressive and if you can make it to one of their parties you should definitely put it on your list of things to do before you die. All the big shots were there, Fred and Wilma; Mt. Dew; Breaking Amish; a Pumpkin; a Pirate; and a Gorilla (or one of the Beehlers, not Kathy or Heidi though). Saturday night my work was having a Halloween cruiser ride and the theme was Vikings (not the football team, although I did consider going as a Vikings Cheerleader). I decided it would be funny to go as a Viking Lego so spent on and off that day working on my costume but had a back up of an 80s prom queen outfit. I told one of my coworkers I wanted to be an 80s prom queen and he asked “for Halloween or just in life” I said both. I couldn’t quite get the lego box to work and didn’t want to half-ass it so decided to scratch it and rock the 80s so I did my hair but it just didn’t feel right so I went as Alice again. I figured it was fitting because in the weeks leading up to Halloween I’ve been watching Alice in Wonderland and have found most days I feel like Alice. 

See in the movie the characters argue if it’s “the right Alice” that has come to Wonderland, if she is after all the one that will fight the Jabberwocky. She goes through all these changes that causes discomfort and frustration she finds herself either too big or too small and struggles to maintain a normal size. She can’t find logic or meaning in some of the situations she encounters and has do all these puzzles that prove to be rather meaningless or have no purpose. Most of the story takes place in Alice’s dream where real world elements mix with her unconscious state. She faces pressures to conform to society’s expectations but instead grows into a strong-willed, empowered heroine who decides her own fate. 

I think most 20-somethings can relate to Alice, here we are trying to figure out life and the curve balls it has thrown us which we might not ever know the logical reason for getting thrown them. Not to mention trying to figure out just what we want to do with our lives without succumbing to what we think others want us to be. I wrote down a list of all the careers I have ever thought of doing, even if just briefly and realize they only have one thing in common: Me. I’m not sure where that leads me but I’m not worried about it, since the accident I get a whole extra year of life. I also like the element of the dream state in Alice especially because it reminds me of the time when I was knocked out, minus the cat and queens, I haven’t gotten quiet the same answers that Alice got…well at least not yet. So you can see why I thought it was fitting to be Alice both nights, well that and the bloomers were super comfy and when else can I get away with wearing them (except for next year when I’m Little Bo Peep).
 

One of the greatest pleasures of life is searching after one’s own heart

My mom says that this is the hardest prayer to pray. It’s not about what you want it’s about what you need. Which when it comes to Leadville and life in general it can be a hard one. 

Two weeks ago my mom sent me an email to say my grandfather was going to be in surgery, a pretty routine surgery to remove plague from his artery. He had it done a few times before. I didn’t think much of it and had a day off coming up so starting planning my first mountain bike ride. My mom called that night to tell me that surgery didn’t exactly go as planned, instead of one piece of plague there were two and instead of taking an hour it took three. When he got out of surgery he suffered a stroke. It still didn’t really hit me that it was bad, I’ve interned in hospitals and spent time in surgery wards and I have a lot of faith in the medical community. Especially because he was in a hospital when it happened so they could respond to it right away. Tuesday night I finished writing and painting my nails and had the next day off, I figured I would go ride up at Leadville because it might be the last week of nice weather. I got a call from my mom saying that they were making him comfortable, which is never what you want to hear. She said they were going to stop his dialysis, and that I should start praying that “thy will be done” because he’s had a long good life and it’s okay if it’s his time to go. I asked her if I should come home, and she said she would never tell me not to but it was up to me. The decision weighed heavily on me to go back, I finally decided that I didn’t want my last memory of him to be in the hospital, instead I would leave it with him sitting in his living room chair talking about Leadville with him. I decided to stick with my plan to go back to Leadville. 

Even with the back flexibility of Shawn Johnson this was still not comfortable

I went to ride the same route that I did the day I crashed, I knew if I didn’t do it this season it would be harder to get back up there this spring, or on a bike for that matter. It’s interesting though how this crash compares to the car crash, I really don’t have any PTSD symptoms related to this one and I really think that it’s because I have no memory of it so I’m not having to relive it every time a similar scenario happens like sometimes it does with cars. I knew I needed to tell someone where I was going but didn’t want to add stress to my parents fretting about me being out there alone. I texted my roommate to tell him “I’m riding up at Columbine, if you haven’t heard from me by 3 something bad happened.” I rode without my Garmin and heart rate monitor and only a watch so I would know to check in by 3 but I don’t want to get obsessive about numbers so figured I could do without the other things. Because my stem was bent I swapped it out but the only one I could find was a 75mm instead of my 90mm. It created quiet the neck-breaker geometry but I figured I would lower my seat on the way down this time. 

This is what did me in…..yah

“X” marks the spot!

I started riding and passed the campsite that I took shelter at on the day of the crash when it had started raining. Around the bend from that is actually where I crashed, it’s embarrassing how uneventful the place is where I crashed. I didn’t want to stop on the way up because it had only been about a mile so decided I would stop on the way down, this time by choice. I rode up to the top and stopped to walk around and lower my seat. I also ate a banana in case the crash was from diabetic shock (not that I’m diabetic but I’ve always been overly cautious of developing it, like one week in college I would wake up 2 or 3 times to pee at night and thought that I had it, I told Molly but she said to call her when I went into diabetic shock, I later realized I was just drinking an obnoxious amount of water, but still better to be safe). I started the way back down and was a little disappointed I didn’t really have any flash back moments like they do in the movies (if only my life was scripted too…sigh) I stopped at the area of the crash and got off to walk around like I did in my dream. It was weirdly familiar, I sat on the log I did in my dream. I would have thought it really did happen that day but for the fact that some of the people that were in my dream have already died and some of the other people live miles away. (Kidding about the dead people being there, there was only one, but I don’t think I’m crazy and I don’t think I had an afterlife experience- I think my subconscious took note of my surroundings and then relayed them into my dream.) 

When I got done I checked in with my roommate he asked how it went, and I said good, pretty uneventful but it was good. He then asked, “Where is Columbine?” I said, “You know the place I crashed up at Leadville.” Yah it’s a good thing I survived- here I was trying to be responsible, next time I’ll just leave GPS coordinates.

The next morning my mom was on the way to the hospital when she called to tell me my grandpa had passed on. I hadn’t left for work yet so took some time to get somewhat composed (mainly wipe the makeup that had gone all over my face off) and then went off to work. My mom called me again when I was driving and told me there was a miscommunication and he wasn’t dead (I’m really not sure how that gets lost in translation) by then she was at the hospital and was able to put the phone up to his ear so I could tell him I loved him. He passed on about an hour later, however, it was about another hour after that before they told me. I think they wanted to make sure it was for real this time, that’s not exactly news you want to mess up….again…

I flew home 2 days later and stayed for about 5, which as horrible as it was it was nice to be with family and friends and spend some time up there. During the funeral I was sitting there thinking of all the things he had accomplished, he crammed a lot into 90 years, probably what it would take most to do in two or three lifetimes. The span of lives he touched is enormous and the legacy he leaves behind is what legends are made of. I sat there thinking I want to be like that, so I came to the conclusion that I should stop doing reckless things, so I at least have a shot at reaching 90, mainly just take up knitting, reading and the occasional crossword, nothing too crazy like Sudoku. It’s one thing to die and leave your family when you’re 90, but another to go when you’re 23 because you crash riding your bike. I was all ready to hang up my helmets, retire from racing (haha) find a nice boy, finish my masters, and lay stake on a house with a white picket fence and call it good. After the burial we were loitering around and close to the last to leave I started walking back to the car with my mom when she put her arm around me and said “he loved hearing about all your adventures, even the ones that drove me crazy.” Game on.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Leadville 2013 is on his birthday.

The circus is calling!

I haven’t written in a while because I keep thinking I’m going to get back on my bike so I should wait till that happens. Well it’s not so the least I can do is update you on my life now that the glitter has worn off from Disneyland. I thought I would ride when I went back to my parents last week, as H-town is pretty safe traffic wise and nothing really technical mountain. But I didn’t want to go out by myself, it’s not that I’m worried about crashing so much I’m worried about crashing by myself again and taking another 6 years off my parents lives as a result. So the only bikes I have been on at this point is my baby bike, which I ride around at work (it compliments the tall bike well) and helps to keep my hips loose (nothing like Mary Clair’s “birthing hips” but pretty good for me). And my cruiser, well actually my roommates cruiser, mostly. I have the same one but mine is pink (although I’m sure Ross from Friends would argue it’s “salmon”) and his is silver and has black pegs so I usually take it so people think I’m a badass even when I wear a skirt (which I’ve actually found why they make women’s bike with slopping toptubes, so do you don’t flash someone when wearing a skirt and getting off your bike, those little life lessons that are rather important). He’s not riding it much so I figure why not, all I need is a fake tattoo arm sleeve to give me real street credit. 

The most BAs you’ve ever seen right?

I know that I’m ready to bike though, like last time when I was sitting in Russian class and heard cmertb (death) and knew it was time to get back on the bike. Only this time it was a UPS guy who set me off. See I finally ordered a helmet specifically for mountain biking, it’s black and I think it will serve me well. When he walked into the store with my box I was immediately overcome with excitement, so much so that I could not contain it and skipped up to meet him. I professed “I get to ride my bike now!” he didn’t exactly share my enthusiasm. I figured that was a good sign. I also switched out my stem because it was bent, which threw the handlebars off. It made me feel better that there was some damage to the bike (I’m glad it wasn’t a lot) like maybe I didn’t sacrifice my body to save my bike but we were in the crash together. (Is it problematic how much I humanize my bikes?) Now I just have to ride. Stay tuned…

Let me fill you in on what has happened, and then hasn’t. 
I bought a new computer…and then returned it.
I started class at DU…and then dropped it. 
See I bought the new computer because with going back to school Apple had a student promo. Nothing was terribly wrong with my computer, it’s a little old and it’s nickname in college was Terry, because if it’s not plugged into a power outsource it dies…I know sooo inappropriate (but a little funny?). But nothing really wrong. And I returned it after I dropped my class, because I felt bad getting a discount and not being a student anymore….I really can’t afford to do anything that compromises my karma these days. 
The class at DU was Global Health Affairs, which I’m really interested in but it didn’t sit too well that it was in the International School and I would be required to get a masters in that field while only getting the certificate in GH. After having a lack-luster major in college I want to be excited about my Masters. I actually found a program at CU in the Public Health School that I’m really excited about and applied into that to start in the spring. 

I was also a little anxious about starting class as I still have some memory lapses and have some issues speaking that I’m hoping are the result of the concussion and not the fact that I’m getting old (I’m 2 years away from being a quarter done with my life). It takes me a little longer to formulate sentences that are fluid and I put abnormally awkward pauses in that would make Mrs. Rowley cringe. The only other repercussion that has seemed to linger, well not so much linger but more enhance a problem that was already there is my complete lack of direction. I still have no idea what streets run parallel and which are perpendicular to my house. I’ve had to dismiss phone calls to get on google maps and then only to find out I’m 2 blocks from my house. I’m not sure that will get better, but I wouldn’t be upset if it did. 

I’ve also been running and swimming more. I really like swimming, well more like I like it after I’m done swimming but I would recommend it to everyone. Running is good I usually stick to 30-45 minutes but I’m not really time obsessive about anything these days so I just run until I don’t want to anymore. Hopefully I don’t end up like Forrest Gump. I was thinking the other night when I was running how when I couldn’t run, biking was there for me and when biking is on pause, running is there. Maybe one day they’ll both be on and I’ll do a triathlon- HA! Because we all know how well I train for running events…

You will not regret this decision.

I’ve also been reading more (I don’t know if anything can beat a book in a park). Recently I’ve read “How to be a Woman” by Caitlin Moran (pronounced Cat-lin, she misread a name when she was a kid and has kept it up for 27 years, as her real name is Catherine) and while I don’t think I’m much closer to landing a date after finishing it, one thing she said stuck with me. She lives her life like there is no Heaven. Not that she doesn’t believe in a higher being but rather she argues we get complacent because we believe there will be another chance waiting in Heaven. To make amends with someone, to tell them how you really feel, to have a second chance. We take life more like a waiting room for the bountiful feast that awaits on the other side. What if it’s not waiting wouldn’t that change how you lived? If we don’t do it right this time, well have a chance to fix it on the other side. I was reminded of this when I was flipping through my photos when I was backing up Terry, and I saw all the pictures from my training rides, I rode in some beautiful scenery, but I’m not sure I ever really saw it. And then I realized I get to do it all again, better this time and I didn’t have to die to get my second chance. I’m a pretty lucky girl.

And I can’t wait.

I had planned to write about suffering but I couldn’t really get into a flow. I tried, really. For almost a week because I had come across this article about suffering and passion in bicycling magazine. Which spurred me into thinking about my brief relationship with Latin, because one of the few words I remember is Pati, which means suffer. (Maybe had I actually stuck with one language instead of taking 3 different ones I might remember more than a few words in each. It’s like I met each one at a bar and after a brief encounter realized a long-term relationship wasn’t worth pursuing…). The article says that suffering and passion both stem from the word Pati. It stated that “suffering is essential to the beauty and mystery of the sport.” I really tried to jump on board with this article because I thought of all the times I suffered when I was riding-I was like finally, suffering! Yes! But suffering is something we create, a way to limit ourselves from the possibilities we think are too far out of reach. The word suffering to me conjures up this idea of pain, hurt, despair, not being able to eat for days, being ripped away from your family as a child sold into the sex slave, watching your father die from the rebels, that’s suffering. But being on a bike isn’t the same suffering, it’s not a miserable state to be in it’s a euphoric state where you realize you are on the cusp of greatness, even if it’s just beating your time up the same hill you’ve done for years. And I don’t think that those who can suffer the most on the bike are the best. Sure you can handle a little more lactic acid but it’s more about their focus, their drive, that passion that keeps them going. It’s their intent to why they are riding, because intent is really just the building blocks of the outcome. I think that’s where I ran into problems because my intent for Leadville wasn’t pure but I thought that by doing it, it would erase everything that had happened by getting hit by a car. Now going into it again, I have to figure out why I really want to do it, other than to be a badass.

Is this what I look like when I stand next to Frank?

California finally happened, which for the first day I kept smiling because I couldn’t believe that I was finally there. We spent 4 days at the beach and 1 day at Disneyland. Being at the beach was delectable, being out there in the moment it was perfect. It’s awe-inspiring to be in front of something that is so majestic and at the same time so destructible. I borrowed one of Mary Clair’s swimsuits because it didn’t have straps so I could work on removing those awesome tan lines I got in Vegas, it was great for working on my tan, not so much for boogie boarding. Luckily that was a day that not too many people were at the same beach. We also rented surf boards for 2 days, which I’ve never done before. My roommate brought his wetsuits so we wouldn’t have to rent them. When he told me you don’t wear a swimsuit with them I think I gave him the same look that my mom gave me when I told her you don’t wear underwear with cycling shorts. Changing out of that into a swimsuit on the beach was definitely a challenge while trying to remain somewhat dignified and not exposing everything at once. It was like all my changing before my rides prepared me for that moment. Ha. My mom told me before she didn’t want me to try surfing because she didn’t want me to hit my head again, which is a valid concern, and which is why I’m only tell her now. Every time I would fall off I would hear her voice go, “not the head, not the head” and throw my arms over my head and lie underwater until I thought it was safe to come off without getting a surf board to the face. Surfing was pretty cool, at least the 2 times I stood up, most of the other time I was wrestling (mostly getting destroyed) by the waves while trying to stay laying down on the board. My old swim coaches, actually any of my old coaches would not be impressed with my lack of athleticism I showed in the water. I think anyone who saw me was amazed at how bad of a swimmer I was in the ocean. I would be 3 feet from the beach and get taken out from a wave.

Skipping into the Happiest Place on Earth

I don’t know why they have cameras anyways…

Disneyland was magical. Everything I thought it would be and so much more. Jessie is a pro at going so knew how to coordinate all the rides so we could make the most out of our day. And we did. Tower of Terror, Splash Mountain, Space Mountain, Screamin’ California, Soaring California, Toy Story Game, and the Tea Cup Ride, which I’m proud to say I did not throw up on this time. The pictures of us on the rides are pretty comical and almost always the same, My eyes are closed and I appear to be screaming, Jessie seems to be thoroughly enjoying herself, and my roommate looks so nonchalant it’s like he’s not even on a ride.  I was hoping to run into Cinderella, as she’s my favorite princess, mainly because we have so much in common what with her falling down stairs, losing her things and having nothing good happening to her after midnight, that and we both believe a pair of shoes can change your life. Instead we saw Sleeping Beauty, so I took my picture with her even though I’m not a fan of the fact that she fell asleep only to marry the first guy that came along when she woke up. But I guess it worked out as they lived Happily Ever After.

The only bike I’ve been on so far is my cruiser. I have to check in with people when I leave and when I get home because they don’t trust me to be able to ride 3 miles by myself and be okay, but I’m sure my mom appreciates that fact. I still need to find a helmet. I know that part of me not getting one is not finding one that really fits me, but I also know that part of it is that I won’t have an excuse to not ride anymore. I’m not so much scared of getting back on my bike and riding but just at how fast everything can happen. Needless to say I’m not planning any solo rides. I haven’t given Leadville too much thought because there is no point in letting it consume my life at this point. I am thinking about getting a Scott bike for next year though. It’s a girl specific bike, which is probably why I want it but the resale market would be so small that I’d have to commit to keeping to for a while so I’m not sure about that. Plus I’m bonded with my bike now so I’m not sure I want to go through that again, because I’m getting a little old to be sleeping in the back of my car with bikes. At least it’s bikes and not boys.